How did you find your girlfriend
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Shy Guys, How Did You Meet Your GF? (Couples Stories r/AskReddit)Content:
- How did you meet your girlfriend or boyfriend?
- Where Will You Find Your Dream Girlfriend?
- Introverts anxiously reveal how they met their significant other (10 Photos)
- Where and how did you meet your gf/wife
- 20 Questions To Ask Your Girlfriend’s Parents When You Meet
- 50 Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend
- 250+ Questions To Ask A Girl If You Want To Know Who She REALLY Is
- Focus on the person in front of you
- How did you meet your girlfriend?
How did you meet your girlfriend or boyfriend?
I was in 2 serious relationships one 1,5 year long and the other one 3 years and 4 or 5 small ones, but they can't really be called "relationships". I no longer keep in touch with a great majority of all the girls I've ever met. But I did a lot of things with these female friends and exes: visiting restaurants, parks, cities, going abroad, etc.
I know a lot of places that are worth a visit or things which are fun to do together because I was there or did those things with some other girl before.
I don't really hide this. I've been in multiple relationships now where I always have a hard time telling those stories or speaking about certain things, because to my girlfriends I always speak about other girls or, especially, my exes just because I did more stuff with the exes, so they come up more often as an answer.
My girlfriends sometimes feel like I am constantly comparing them to each other. Usually, it goes like this: My girlfriend and I go somewhere together to someplace I know is fine. We talk and at one point in the conversation, sooner or later, this magical question appears: "Did you come here before? Or we go to some new place and in the conversation, I mention a story where I experienced something similar but different in some aspects or totally different.
The magic question comes again: "Who were you there with? Were you there alone? I've never had a feeling that these questions were asked on purpose to test whether I'm a womanizer or something, rather out of pure curiosity, just like when two people are getting to know each other. I fought long battles explaining that those girls don't matter to me, and I'm telling her about the place or thing because of the importance of it in this particular moment, and not because of the girl I was there with at that time.
Adding to that, whenever we talk about myself and my past, my exes may come up. An example: I can say that I like dancing and I danced ballroom dances for 2 years which is quite obvious that I had to have a partner. Or this is a big one about something that I didn't like about an ex or generally speaking about women. I'm afraid that I can mention my exes in a more casual setting like "I'm glad that you're not like that one because she was always X and Y". For my next relationship, how can I honestly address those kinds of questions without coming across like I'm always talking about my exes?
You don't need to avoid mentioning them. Just talk about them the same way as you would talk about any other male friends that you might have done things with. Much like your description of your background, I grew up with a lot of female friends, many of whom were among my closest friends. When I finally started dating, I remained friends with the majority of my exes after breaking up and one of them remains perhaps my closest friend some 25ish years later.
On top of that, ballroom and tango dancing were my primary social activities for many years. From the description in the question of how these conversations go, I think I can see why you might have problems: In your attempts to avoid mentioning who you were with, you come off as being conspicuously evasive. When people notice that you're trying to avoid telling them something, they naturally become suspicious and will frequently assume the worst because, if it wasn't bad, why would you be trying to keep it a secret?
This is why I talk about my female friends the same way as I talk about my male friends, and suggest that you should try to do the same.
If I talk about Mary the same way and as easily as I talk about John, then it's generally assumed that I interact with both of them the same way as well.
If, on the other hand, I talked freely about John, but became evasive whenever Mary came up in conversation, then that can be read as implying that I have a different relationship with Mary than with John - perhaps even that I'm secretly in love with her - which is just what you're trying to avoid. I too have had my fair share of female friends. I've also had a couple of serious relationships before finding my wife.
This answer is based on my discussions with my now wife when those other girls came up in conversation. Using the following aproaches have either prevented my now wife from asking those questions in the first place, or if they did come up, allowed me to answer them truthfully without upsetting her.
I agree with Dave's answer about regular friends that happen to be girls. As long as you're honest about them being just friends and tell about them exactly the same way as if you would if they were boys it shouldn't cause much jealousy.
The first time I mentioned a new girl my wife would also ask who she was. After explaining who she was and the rest of the friend group we were in at that time sometimes consisting of only 4 girls for example I could usually continue casually with my non-romantic story.
What could be a lot trickier is talking about your experiences with ex girlfriends. If you revisit some romantic place and the first thing you talk about is how awesome your date with other girl was in this magical place then of course your current girlfriend isn't going to be happy. You're implying that she has to make this date at least as nice as the one in your memory.
Even if you never intended to do so. During the date did I mention romantic place? I did right You're there to make fun new memories with your new girlfriend, not to relive your memories of your ex. Don't even talk about your memories of the place at all.
The only exception to this is when you suggest the next place to go. For example if you're on a city trip you can say something like "There's this nice view 2 blocks from here that you just have to see". Of course she'll know that you've been there before with your ex girlfriend, otherwise you wouldn't know about the view. Your attention at that time is clearly with her, not in the memories of the place.
In case you aren't planning to go somewhere specific but just happen to come across a place with a strong memory, like walking past your old dancing school. There's nothing wrong with casually mentioning that you've learned how to dance there. During that explanation of course you're going to talk about your ex girlfriend. Don't lie about it, don't try to leave her out of it. Oh look it's [dancing school], that's where I've learned how do dance about 5 years ago when I was still going out with girl X.
Do you know how to ballroom dance? You're just talking about something you experienced in the past. Don't try to downplay it as something not important. Don't lie about it. Just say it as it is. If it's the first time you mention girl X and your girlfriend wants to know who it is just tell the truth:.
It's not a secret that I went out with girl X 5 years ago. We were a thing, we had many nice moments but it didn't work out in the end so we broke up after 1,5 years. One of the nice things about that relationship is that I'm now great at ballroom dancing, you want me to teach you? This way, you show you have nothing to hide.
That girl has been important to you some time in your life, but that's now in your past. The fact that you can now casually talk about it means you got over it and you can now focus on what your current girlfriend means to you. You should however try to avoid comparing your current girlfriend to your exes. Saying something like. Instead, since you know what you want, word it in a way that doesn't compare her instead:. I think Dave Sherohman's answer is a very good one for part of your context how to mention other girls when doing an activity with a girlfriend which you used to do with other girls.
I want to address the other part, which you added later on. You don't just mention your exes to provide information about how you found a place. You seem to talk about their character, their quirks, and to compare them to your current girlfriend. You responded to one of my comments where I wondered if you mention your exes without prompting by saying "If it's that I start a conversation myself from telling stories involving other girls, then no".
But other stuff you said seems to contradict this see above. You yourself say that other girls have felt constantly compared to your exes, I don't think they would feel that way if you were just mentioning stuff like that you came to this restaurant with ex A in the past.
I know you say you don't mention your exes otherwise, but again some things you've said contradicts this statement. So if I were you, I would pay some attention to this in my next relationship. I've dated very little before my current relationship which is now 5 years long and only had one serious relationship one year long before this one. So it would have been very easy to fall into the trap of "Oh, B did it this way" or "I liked doing X with B, I miss it, are you interested in doing this?
I also learned a lot of lessons out of my first relationship, so there are things that I do that are related to my first relationship. However, it's often not necessary to mention it to my boyfriend. Often it's not the case. For example, if you still say things like "I'm glad that you're not like my ex A because she was always X and Y", stop that.
It maybe feels like you're paying them a compliment, but comparing them to another girl isn't a compliment. You can say the compliment without mentioning someone else "I really like Z about you". If it's something that is truly important to you or that you feel strongly about, you can do that without mentioning someone specific:. By putting things this way, you put the focus on your current girlfriend and what you like about her or don't like, the same principle applies, don't compare them to your ex who was so great at it.
It also gives the impression you value her for the person she is, and not how she is or isn't compared to some other girl. If you're still in the habit to mention your exes by comparing them to your current girlfriends, it probably adds to their irritation when you bring them to some place where you also brought your ex. It might also be why they grill you on who you were with. I go through these situations occasionally. Even now, I have a friend girl, simple friendship only , to whom I do not want to mention that something happened while I was with another girl.
It may happen that you slip unintentionally some information that one of them was a girl. That is OK, from my point of view, and you should not panic.
Where Will You Find Your Dream Girlfriend?
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Were you first friends? Did a friend introduce you two? Were you in a public place and you just met? I don't have a girl friend. And we were friends first.
Introverts anxiously reveal how they met their significant other (10 Photos)
Guys, how did you find out your special one was cheating on you? This guy shared his story anonymously:. My now ex-girlfriend got a job in another state and moved there. After moving, she sent me a couple of emails with pictures of her new apartment and workplace. Then the frequency and quality of our phone conversations dropped. She said that she needed this time off to focus on her new life and de-stress. We were having issues about if and when we were both going to get married soon. A month later, on her birthday, I sent her flowers and chocolates and tried to call her but it went to voicemail every time. After a few days, she sent me a thank you note and told me she had taken off on an unplanned trip to Canada with her girl friend.
Where and how did you meet your gf/wife
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After that.. We kept hanging out.. I'd asked for his number from Earl, because I'd "forgotten to get it when I was visiting. That's the details
20 Questions To Ask Your Girlfriend’s Parents When You Meet
It might feel a bit cheesy or forced at first, but engaging your girlfriend in new topics of discussion can help bring you closer. What did you want to grow up to do when you were 5? What about 15? Who was the most popular girl in your seventh-grade class?
I met my in a college party, beer is a very usefull tool. I was born with my right hand attached to me :oops: nickmag. Met her at one of my gigs. I was moving my equipment into the building in the rain. She came over and dried my music stand off.
50 Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend
A girlfriend is a female friend or acquaintance , often a regular female companion with whom one is platonic , romantically or sexually involved. A girlfriend can also be called an sweetheart, darling, or honey. Partners in committed relationships are also sometimes described as a " significant other " or simply "partner", especially if the individuals are cohabiting. How the term is used will ultimately be determined by personal preference. In , a study was conducted of people ages 21 to 35 who were either living with or had lived with a romantic partner. It notes that the lack of proper terms often leads to awkward situations, such as someone becoming upset over not being introduced in social situations to avoid the question. There exists some ambiguity between the terms "girl friend," or a friend who is a girl, and "girlfriend. Both forms of "girlfriend" and "girl friend" are used by different people to mean different things.
Just 20 proven steps you can start using right now to attract the girl you like and make her your girlfriend. Stop trying to get a girlfriend. The first step to getting a girlfriend is to stop trying. Instead go into every new interaction you have with women expecting nothing in return.
250+ Questions To Ask A Girl If You Want To Know Who She REALLY Is
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship, but it can be difficult to keep the conversation flowing. Asking questions is the best way to get your partner talking, and will improve your relationship and increase your intimacy. Read on for over questions to ask your girlfriend, from kinky questions to serious questions.
Focus on the person in front of you
Start your search for a girlfriend by meeting more girls through clubs, events, and mutual friends. Then, impress girls by looking your best and talking to them. When you find a girl who interests you, ask her on a date.
How did you meet your girlfriend?